No Job

Lost my job in April, it’s now almost August and I got nothin. Funny how the days run together when you have nothing to do all day. Hard to get out of bed in the morning really.


Hey, I am moving! Yay! I realize nobody cares, but, well, it is exciting. Should be out of our old place by August 1st. The new place is way nicer and as such the rent is 3x higher, but oh well.

Where are Google’s Kernel Modifications?

Everybody loves Google. Their search technology is great, and they generally seem to follow their credo of “Don’t Be Evil.” So they have tons of good karma built up, which leads me to ask the following question out of curiosity and without meaning to imply anything bad about Google.

Google now sells the Google Search Appliance, a 1U machine that sits on a corporate intranet and allows intranet users to search company documents with Google-esque speed and accuracy. And as we all know, Google itself runs on Linux, as does its appliance.

My question is, now that Google is selling a machine that runs Linux, don’t they have to also distribute any GPL code on the device — such as the Linux kernel, and any modifications they’ve made to it? I asked Google about this via their “request information” form, but have not yet received a reply. I guess since I expressed no interest in purchasing an appliance they skipped over my message. All google is required to do is provide the source code to the people who receive the binaries (if, in fact, they have modified and distributed any GPL code), which they may be doing, but since I don’t know anyone who has one of these, I can’t determine whether or not the source is provided with the device. There is no mention of the GPL or Linux in the appliance’s license terms, though the following clause IS there:

Any and all third party binary or source code included in the Product may be used only in conjunction with the Appliance, and such use shall be subject to all the terms and conditions of this Agreement. THE PRODUCT OR ANY PORTION THEREOF MAY NOT BE USED, COPIED, TRANSFERRED, OR MODIFIED EXCEPT AS EXPRESSLY PERMITTED BY THIS AGREEMENT.

Not exactly consistent with the GPL, is it? But like I said, Google has lots of good karma built up, so they get the benefit of the doubt. But… where’s the source?

Jibber Jabber

Ok, well, I haven’t written in this space in quite a while. I have been putting most of my thoughts on my own website, but the stuff that’s happened recently in my life seems better suited to this arena.

For the past couple of months my girlfriend’s mother has been having some health problems. I think in October she was diagnosed with pneumonia and it hasn’t really ever gone away. My girlfriend doesn’t really keep in close contact with her mom that often, usually they talk a couple of times a week over AIM I think. We live in NY and her mom lives in Florida. We don’t have long distance so AIM is really the most feasible option.

Anyhow, I guess around Monday of last week she went to see another doctor because she was coughing up some blood. She went in for tests and on Friday she was told she has cancer and there is a tumor in her lung. My girlfriend called me at work hysterical. She and her brother were trying to get a flight for that night but there were none. I rushed home and we packed and caught the 7:30 AM flight from JFK to west palm beach.

I have to make clear how terrified my girlfriend is of flying. She had never flown before in her life, and had no intention of ever doing so. Numerous trips of ours were called off because I don’t feel like wasting days on trains or driving and she is terrified of flying. But this time her mom wanted her to be there in case anything happened, so there was really no choice. Her plan was to get totally hammered before boarding the plane. But we had no alcohol in the house and when we got to JFK, there was no bar. So she was freaking out, but really it went fine and she was fine. It was a beautiful day and there was only a little turbulence. This was the first time I’d flown in like 5 years so I was a bit nervous myself.

So we got to West Palm Beach and I was glad I wore my convertible pants, which unzip at the knee and turn into shorts. It was 35 degrees in NY when we left, and it was easily 79 in FL. I did feel like an ass walking around with my coat, but oh well. We got the rental car and went directly to the hospital, which was like 20-30 minutes away.

The next few days were harrowing, and everyone was pretty much unsatisfied with the hospital. One doctor in particular was extremely bad, having told her she could die “at any time.” Then there was the oncologist, a surgeon, and eventually a radiologist and a couple more. But the incompetence of the primary doctor convinced my girlfriend, her brother, and their mother to move her to Sloan-Kettering in NYC, which is apparently the #1 cancer center in the country. After a bunch of BS, she was on the plane on Wednesday and in NYC by 6:00 pm that night. Of course, it couldn’t be that simple — the primary doctor in Florida hadn’t sent the referral like he had to and said he would, so they wouldn’t admit her. They went back the next day, and still no referral, still she couldn’t get in.

Today they had an appointment at 1:00 pm and I guess the doctor said “there’s a 30% chance you’ll live more than two years.” So everybody is generally depressed. It really sucks major ass. I don’t put much faith in what doctors say, no matter how famous or world-renowned they may be. But I’m not the one who received this news either.

So that is the latest catastrophe in our ongoing saga. I sometimes feel like there is a doomcloud following us around. We try to make the best of the situation, but jesus, what more can we be expected to do.

To add insult to injury, I asked my boss for a raise on Friday before I found out about this whole cancer ordeal. Then I had to leave work early and miss Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday of this week. Way to make an impression. Anyhow, I still think I’m worth it, I just hope he thinks so too. I am still drowning in debt and the job that my girlfriend almost had was cut by that motherfucker bloomberg, so again I am supporting 2 people and 2 dogs on a pittance. I have been trying to be strong, if only for my girlfriend’s sake, but sometimes I just honestly don’t know how much more I can take. Tomorrow we are waking up at 6:00 am and she is taking her mom in for a 9:30 appointment at sloan, and dropping me off at work on the way.

It is my sister’s birthday on Saturday and I promised her a TV-VCR combo which I cannot afford to get her. I have months worth of student loans still unpaid. George Bush is a stupid motherfucker who thinks tax cuts and more military spending are the cure for everything. I can’t believe how much slack the media are cutting him and Cheney when they fucking impeached Clinton for getting a blowjob. And you wonder why people hate republicans.

John Deep apparently wants the Mac Aimster source code from me, and I guess offered a whopping $350 for it! He owes me $7500. John, if you’re reading this, I will settle for $6,000. Then you can have it and I will wipe it completely from my hard drive. I have no use for it whatsoever, but I am not giving it to you until I get my money. The only copies of it in existence are PGP encrypted, so hax0ring me for them won’t do you any good.

I should probably write in this thing more frequently. Then I can look back with fascination at the different events in my life. But I really do not have the time nor the inclination to do so. Anyhow, I guess that’s a wrap for now. Oh yeah, and Aimster finally gave up to AOL and changed their name to ‘Madster’. Madeline = “Aimee” so Aimster -> Madster. Get it? My theory is proven once again — Aimster/Madster is just a vehicle for John to promote his daughter.

Adios señores y señoras. :-/

Ah well

The NYS department of labor is completely useless. I fund them with my tax dollars and they apparently go out of their way to not help me. They first found a way to screw me out of my unemployment, then told me they wouldn’t help me get the money Aimster owes me because I grossed over $600/week.

Anyhow, things seem to be going better in the rest of my life. Christmas is just around the corner and I basically haven’t paid any of my bills and instead bought christmas presents. Yeah, totally irresponsible of me, but my credit is already complete shit due to Aimster, so I really don’t care at this point.

The animosity I feel towards John, Bill Duker, and the rest of the Aimster execs hasn’t decreased much over the past few months. But after the department of labor refused to help me I was sort of at a loss. I don’t have the money to spend on a lawyer so it seems that at this point in time I’m just going to have to deal with this. Which of course sucks big time. But like I said, there’s not much I can do. I’ll look into contacting the NYS attorney general someday, but this time of year sucks.

Additionally, this company is comprised of the worst gaggle of idiots and crooks you’ll ever encounter. They take your money, do half a job, then when you ask them for help so that you can finish the other half yourself (remember, you paid them to do the whole thing!) they refuse and say it’s a technical support issue. Trust me on this. They are completely incompetent. Their website is filled with lies, such as their claim to have created some “ImageServer” technology. Their “ImageServer technology” is just ImageMagick.

On the brighter side, my girlfriend appears to have gotten a job which will apparently start in January, so hooray! Maybe now we can afford to live above ground! We’ve been living in a basement for quite some time, and it’s really getting to us both.

And also, Castle Wolfenstein is the best game in years. I command you to get it!

Merry Christmas, Chappy Chanukah, and… well, fuck Kwanzaa, it’s fake anyway. Chanukah too. Ok, Christmas too. Happy presnt-giving-day(s)! And Happy New Year!

Here’s what the American people should get for Christmas, since it’s been taken away recently. Adios!


I got this emailed to me today:

Date: Tue, 30 Oct 2001 10:06:38 -0500
From: Ed Kear <>
To: me
Subject: PI2 Options Agreement For me

Dear me,

The accompanying Word 2000 document is the forebearance agreement Bill Duker mentioned at the end of August. I received some of these back electronically back then, but not from everyone. To make this legal, you must return a hard copy version of it signed by you (I will sign it when returned) and mail it to me at Ideal Ventures. If you have any questions about any of this, feel free to call me at 518-434-6543 (Ideal Ventures Phone #).



Ideal Ventures
80 State St, 6th Floor
Albany, NY 12207

The following was attached:


Dear my name:

This letter acknowledges your agreement to accept an option to acquire 10 shares of Pi2, Inc. (the "Company") common stock, at an exercise price of $0.01, per share ("Salary Deferral Option") in full consideration for your agreement to defer receipt of salary owed to you for services you rendered to the Company prior to August 27, 2001, until the Company obtains financing in a minimum amount of $250,000.00. The Salary Deferral Option is immediately vested and may be exercised by you at any time during your employment, or within one year after you terminate your employment with the Company.

You have been advised that the Company is currently attempting to raise additional financing. You have also been advised that the Company may be unable to raise this additional financing.

You further agree to accept options to acquire shares of the Company's common stock ("Shares") at an exercise price of $0.01 per share, in addition to cash compensation for services rendered to the Company subsequent to August 27, 2001 (the "Salary Award Option"). The number of shares subject to your Salary Award Option shall be equal to your current salary rate for the period you perform services for the Company subsequent to August 27, 2001 divided by a per share price of $60.43 per Share. The Salary Option Award is also fully vested and may be exercised by you at any time during your employment, or within one year after you terminate employment with the Company.

If the terms of this agreement are acceptable to you, please sign both copies of this letter and return one signed copy to me.

Pi2, Inc.

By: __________________________
Edward Kear, CTO

Agreed and Accepted
this First day of September, 2001.

This is quite funny. Yes, I’ll give up my rights to the $7,500 you owe me in exchange for TEN SHARES OF STOCK! And their current value is ZERO! Sure, I’ll do that, right after MONKEYS FLY OUT OF MY ASS!

My dilemma now is, do I simply not reply, or do I reply and tell them to go to hell? God damn, what a fucking bunch of retards. I’m starting to think I should go after John Deep’s personal assets. Let that fucker rot in the street. That’s what he’s willing to let me do. He can whore his daughter to pay his goddamned $1500/month cell phone bill.

Life goes on, sort of.

Well, it seems I somehow managed to get a job! Hooray! I went to the interview and after talking to the president for 2 hours, he offered me the job on the spot! Now I get to do PHP, Oracle, and sysadmin stuff, which is all stuff I wanted to do! The pay is not the best, but that can change. The boss seems like a really cool guy also which is a big bonus after the whole Aimster ordeal. I still really have nowhere to live. The place I’m staying at in Queens, and had been paying for the entire time I was in Albany, well some heartless person reported them to the housing department for having an illegal basement apartment. The complaint was apparently closed since the people who own the house wouldn’t let the inspectors in, but they still want us to move out. I do not know where I am going to live now, and since I now work in Manhattan, my options are a lot more limited with regard to location. My girlfriend is unable to get a job even though she has a Masters degree and is attending Columbia Teacher’s College. Even TC won’t give her a job, even as work study.

So basically everything still sucks, but maybe a little less, in new and exciting ways. All of these events will make for a very interesting autobiography when I am an old man. I mean, on the one hand I am lucky to be alive, but what good does being alive do me if I have nowhere to live and hence no way to get to work? Oh, also I got completely screwed out of my unemployment for the 3 months I was out of work because of incompetence at the Unemployment Office. But like the title says, life goes on, sort of.

As a special bonus to you, here is a transcript of the chat I had with John Deep, Aimster’s CEO. This is from Friday, October 12th, 2001. He’s johnnyaimster (on AIM) and I’m the other one. I changed my screen name and email address to prevent spam. Note how any time I mention selling Aimster he completely ignores it. This chat left me feeling a bit sorry for him, as I think he was more delusional than actually evil, but he still owes me a lot of money and he still had me continue working when there wasn’t enough money to pay me (and regardless of what he says here, he knew that) so that’s still intent to defraud, so I’m still going to have to sue him or something, somehow. Enjoy!

Me (1:41:48 PM): Sheila said you wanted to talk to me
johnnyaimster (1:42:58 PM): oh hi...i understand you've gotten very unhappy with the way you were treated?
Me (1:43:03 PM): Yes.
Me (1:43:27 PM): And I think that is understandable.
johnnyaimster (1:43:27 PM): well the company had to treat everyone equally
Me (1:43:33 PM): I know that
Me (1:43:51 PM): But nobody warned me, or anybody, that there were money problems
johnnyaimster (1:43:53 PM): if it were up to me i would have tried to give you special consideration for you circumstances
johnnyaimster (1:44:13 PM): but that just isn't possible
Me (1:44:25 PM): I understand that I can't get special treatment
Me (1:44:31 PM): that's not what I was looking for
Me (1:45:12 PM): If you knew there were money problems why didn't you warn anybody before hand so they could have made other arrangements?
Me (1:45:51 PM): As it was I was $2000 in debt and was preparing to pay it off with that paycheck that never happened
johnnyaimster (1:45:52 PM): there were no secrets from anyone
Me (1:45:57 PM): ???
Me (1:46:01 PM): How can you say that?
johnnyaimster (1:46:09 PM): you knew what everyone else knew as soon as anyone knew it
Me (1:46:29 PM): So the company ran out of money and nobody knew it, not even the CFO or CEO?
Me (1:46:37 PM): I really find that incredibly difficult to believe.
Me (1:47:15 PM): Why did 60 new computers appear the same week that there wasn't enough money to pay payroll?
johnnyaimster (1:47:36 PM): there are two separate companies you know that
johnnyaimster (1:47:46 PM): pi2 is the software company that you worked for
johnnyaimster (1:48:24 PM): all fo their funds went to payroll right to the last 14k
johnnyaimster (1:48:49 PM): they explaind the whole thing in the meeting...and that was the whole truth
Me (1:49:05 PM): That reeks of fraud
johnnyaimster (1:49:23 PM): evan that's not fair of you to say
Me (1:49:29 PM): John, really it is.
Me (1:49:36 PM): I risked so much to join Aimster
Me (1:49:51 PM): I thought I had planned for every contingency
Me (1:49:59 PM): even if Aimster died I would still be okay
Me (1:50:07 PM): it never occurred to me that you would do what you have done
Me (1:50:39 PM): There's not enough money to pay anybody, so you just pretend there is no problem?
johnnyaimster (1:50:41 PM): now why do you bring me into it...i don't run the software company know that
johnnyaimster (1:51:18 PM): it has its own board and officers and shareholders
Me (1:51:28 PM): And who exactly are those people?
Me (1:51:48 PM): I would really like their names and addresses.
Me (1:52:02 PM): I can get them from the department of state though
johnnyaimster (1:52:28 PM): well i'm sorry you feel that way...and that your financial situation worsened
Me (1:52:45 PM): And really John, regardless of all the corporation mumbo-jumbo, you were always "the boss" regardless of what you may say
johnnyaimster (1:52:48 PM): i really am sorry...but there's nothing i could do at that moment
Me (1:52:58 PM): John, you could have at least WARNED ME!!!!!
Me (1:53:04 PM): Is that so hard to do?
johnnyaimster (1:53:24 PM): well we talked about the situation constantly with everyone
Me (1:53:34 PM): That is incorrect.
johnnyaimster (1:53:48 PM): how there was going to be cash that would come from the buddysharing application if it could be finished
Me (1:53:50 PM): because neither you nor ed told me there were financial woes
Me (1:54:10 PM): And just 2 days before August 10th, Sheila told me there was plenty of money
Me (1:54:21 PM): I'm sure sheila wasn't trying to deceive me
johnnyaimster (1:54:38 PM): no she wasn't
Me (1:55:04 PM): But if she was under the impression that there was a lot of money, I find it hard to believe that "you spoke with everyone"
johnnyaimster (1:55:42 PM): it wasn't me that spoke with them...everyone knew the situation and what we were trying to do to bring in revenue
Me (1:55:58 PM): You cannot say "everyone knew" because I did not know.
johnnyaimster (1:55:59 PM): true it had nothing to do with the mac side of things..the revenue
Me (1:56:34 PM): devising ways to bring in revenue has nothing to do with the current financial state
Me (1:56:41 PM): companies are always looking for new revenue streams
Me (1:56:51 PM): just because we are looking for a revenue stream doesn't mean we have $0
Me (1:57:22 PM): Can you give me the names of the board and officers of BuddyUSA, Pi2, and AbovePeer please.
Me (1:57:52 PM): I know Bill Duker, Paul Goetz, You, John Cavalier
johnnyaimster (1:58:09 PM): evan you shouldn't be like's not fair
Me (1:58:14 PM): Be like what?
Me (1:58:32 PM): I guess you cannot imagine the pile of feces that my life has become John.
johnnyaimster (1:58:35 PM): everyone was trying very hard to keep the guys altogether...including you
Me (1:58:53 PM): I would have rather been laid off than treated the way I was john
Me (1:59:00 PM): As it was I could not even collect unemployment.
johnnyaimster (1:59:11 PM): now why didn't you tell me that before?
johnnyaimster (1:59:17 PM): when you left we had a plan i thought
johnnyaimster (1:59:24 PM): you seemed happy with it at the time
Me (1:59:35 PM): I cannot believe you did not even have the common courtesy to tell me that I wouldn't get paid
johnnyaimster (1:59:46 PM): you were moving to queens, collecting unemployment, taking the computer and working from down there
johnnyaimster (2:00:09 PM): you never let me know you had a more serious problem
Me (2:00:18 PM): I found it hard to believe that you really expected me to work for free; you must have mistaken my shock for happiness
Me (2:00:41 PM): John, I was getting evicted from my apartment!
johnnyaimster (2:00:42 PM): i always liked you a lot and thought of you as a someone i trusted
Me (2:01:01 PM): How could you not have known I was in dire straits when I told you that?
Me (2:01:08 PM): I was already -$300 in my checking account
Me (2:01:11 PM): and I you, john
Me (2:01:26 PM): You cannot imagine the bridges I burned with my family to join Aimster
johnnyaimster (2:01:26 PM): right that's why i feel so bad about this
johnnyaimster (2:01:39 PM): i had no idea i'm sorry
johnnyaimster (2:02:12 PM): i just remember it was like..."i'd like to take time off and try programming..."
Me (2:02:27 PM): I don't really remember what I said
Me (2:02:43 PM): Really I was taking the Mac as sort of collateral
Me (2:02:48 PM): I don't have any use for it
Me (2:02:55 PM): I will gladly return it
johnnyaimster (2:03:33 PM): well what about working from down there when we recover
johnnyaimster (2:03:38 PM): you don't want to do that
Me (2:03:55 PM): If I have time and you can pay me the money you already owe me, then fine
johnnyaimster (2:04:11 PM): evan you are absolutely going to be paid the money you're owed
johnnyaimster (2:04:24 PM): that's not even a question about that
Me (2:04:35 PM): John, after this whole fiasco I really can't give your words much credibility.
johnnyaimster (2:04:36 PM): that's all everyone is trying to do
Me (2:04:48 PM): You owe so much more to all the other employees
johnnyaimster (2:05:13 PM): everyone understands the situation and that they will be paid asap
Me (2:05:29 PM): but when is ASAP?
johnnyaimster (2:05:31 PM): you got the letter with the option offer from ed right...where it was explained?
Me (2:05:43 PM): What happens in the event that Aimster folds completely?
Me (2:05:52 PM): That seems like a very real possibility to me
Me (2:05:56 PM): No, I got nothing from Ed.
johnnyaimster (2:05:57 PM): doesn't matter the payroll still gets paid
Me (2:06:11 PM): How, if the corporation has no assets?
Me (2:06:26 PM): NYS law is that payroll is every 2 weeks
johnnyaimster (2:06:48 PM): payroll gets paid first...the letter that ed sent to everyone explains that
Me (2:06:48 PM): I am not inflexible, but "asap" is not really good enough
Me (2:07:03 PM): He didn't send it to me.
johnnyaimster (2:07:03 PM): it just reiterates what bill said in the meeting
Me (2:07:35 PM): Employees must be paid FIRST.
johnnyaimster (2:07:51 PM): that's correct that's what bill said in the meeting
Me (2:08:00 PM): so who is paying WorldCom and Abovenet?
johnnyaimster (2:08:09 PM): but they also have to be treated equitably
johnnyaimster (2:08:22 PM): meaning you can't pay some employees and not others
Me (2:08:29 PM): I understand that.
Me (2:08:37 PM): I am not asking for special treatment.
Me (2:09:01 PM): But you must owe at least $120,000 in payroll
johnnyaimster (2:09:01 PM): that includes officers, other account payables etc.
Me (2:09:24 PM): on top of the money you owe the 4 windows developers from their contract
Me (2:09:40 PM): so really I doubt I will ever see any of the money I'm owed
johnnyaimster (2:10:10 PM): how much are you owed by the way
Me (2:10:21 PM): how are other account payables on the same footing as payroll?
johnnyaimster (2:10:22 PM): if you happen to know off the top of your head
Me (2:10:26 PM): at least $7500
johnnyaimster (2:10:30 PM): no they're not that's what i'm saying
Me (2:10:33 PM): maybe more if I am still on the payroll
Me (2:10:38 PM): but $7500 for sure
johnnyaimster (2:11:54 PM): howmany weeks is that
Me (2:11:58 PM): 3
johnnyaimster (2:12:19 PM): ok what is that gross or...
Me (2:12:23 PM): Gross
johnnyaimster (2:12:44 PM): ok so is that 2500/week?
Me (2:12:47 PM): Yes
johnnyaimster (2:13:04 PM): you made 2500/week?
Me (2:13:09 PM): Yes.
Me (2:13:14 PM): $65,000 / year
Me (2:13:21 PM): oh no
Me (2:13:26 PM): $2500/ 2 weeks
Me (2:13:30 PM): sorry
johnnyaimster (2:13:49 PM): right 3750 gross?
Me (2:14:00 PM): No, 7500 gross
Me (2:14:04 PM): 3 payroll periods
Me (2:14:10 PM): that's what I thought you meant
johnnyaimster (2:14:11 PM): oh then you mean 3 payperiods
Me (2:14:14 PM): right.
johnnyaimster (2:15:07 PM): checks due on aug10, aug 24 and...?
Me (2:15:52 PM): I worked several days in the week of Aug 20th
Me (2:16:03 PM): the week of Aug 13th I was begging for money from my mother
johnnyaimster (2:16:17 PM): oh man i'm sorry
Me (2:16:24 PM): I know
johnnyaimster (2:16:42 PM): right the first missed check was aug 12th or something
johnnyaimster (2:16:53 PM): then two weeks after that
Me (2:16:55 PM): August 10th
johnnyaimster (2:16:59 PM): right yes
johnnyaimster (2:17:03 PM): then the 24th
Me (2:17:11 PM): but the payroll was 2 weeks in arrears
johnnyaimster (2:17:28 PM): ah ok
johnnyaimster (2:17:53 PM): so then with that there should have been a check sept 6
Me (2:17:53 PM): So August 10th paid for the period 4 weeks ago to 2 weeks ago
Me (2:18:00 PM): I guess
Me (2:18:21 PM): whatever 4 weeks from August 10th was
johnnyaimster (2:18:53 PM): right ok...
johnnyaimster (2:21:01 PM): well ed will send the letter again just so you'll have it
Me (2:21:19 PM): Ok, I guess.
johnnyaimster (2:21:21 PM): sorry you didn't get it...he thought he sent it to everyone
johnnyaimster (2:21:31 PM): what e-mail address should he use
Me (2:21:32 PM): I don't know if my aimster email address still works
Me (2:21:37 PM):
johnnyaimster (2:21:41 PM): ok cool
johnnyaimster (2:22:31 PM): sorry about your situation
johnnyaimster (2:22:58 PM): are you going to be ok
Me (2:23:20 PM): Maybe, I have a couple of prospects.
Me (2:23:34 PM): but soon I will have really nowhere to live
Me (2:23:46 PM): the place we had in queens, they no longer want us to live there
johnnyaimster (2:23:55 PM): well i still hold you in high regard
Me (2:24:01 PM): Well that's nice.
johnnyaimster (2:24:01 PM): if you ever need a reference obviously
Me (2:24:11 PM): And that's it?
johnnyaimster (2:24:14 PM): sorry the feeling isn't mutual anymore
Me (2:24:39 PM): Well how are Aimster's prospects
johnnyaimster (2:24:40 PM): no i mean if we get back on our feet i'd still like to work with you
johnnyaimster (2:24:57 PM): well it's all i do everyday is try to make it work
Me (2:24:59 PM): Oh, yes I would still like to work with you but not like it was before
johnnyaimster (2:25:12 PM): right no i understand
Me (2:25:22 PM): at what point will you throw in the towel?
Me (2:25:36 PM): I mean, if you can't afford to pay developers it doesn't seem you can make much progress
johnnyaimster (2:25:50 PM): we're stuck with the software in its current state
Me (2:25:59 PM): Do you make any money off that store stuff you're doing?
Me (2:26:05 PM): or the donations?
johnnyaimster (2:26:14 PM): not yet...i'm still working on that
johnnyaimster (2:26:30 PM): we're going to put out a club aimster hopefully soon
Me (2:26:31 PM): How can you even afford to pay the rent? It must be extremely expensive there
johnnyaimster (2:26:39 PM): a premium service
johnnyaimster (2:26:46 PM): the rent is in equity
Me (2:26:48 PM): Well, I hope that works out
Me (2:26:55 PM): oh, that's good
Me (2:27:03 PM): And what about Abovenet?
johnnyaimster (2:27:08 PM): yes the ISP bills are accumulating
johnnyaimster (2:27:13 PM): that's the main problem
Me (2:27:22 PM): Abovenet's going to go bankrupt soon I think
johnnyaimster (2:27:32 PM): well we moved out of there
Me (2:27:34 PM): exodus already filed chapter 11
Me (2:27:37 PM): Oh
Me (2:27:59 PM): So everything is running of the computers in the office?
johnnyaimster (2:28:04 PM): yes
Me (2:28:13 PM): all the computers from abovenet are there now too?
johnnyaimster (2:28:24 PM): no we couldn't move them yet
Me (2:28:48 PM): Will they accept those machines as payment?
johnnyaimster (2:29:01 PM): i don't know but i hope it doesn't come to that
Me (2:29:28 PM): Don't you have your own money invested in Aimster?
johnnyaimster (2:29:28 PM): the aimster service is valuable we just haven't monetized it yet
johnnyaimster (2:29:41 PM): yes every last penny
johnnyaimster (2:29:43 PM): stupidly
Me (2:29:49 PM): yes but what kind of a demographic are you getting... people too cheap to even buy a CD?
Me (2:29:56 PM): well I am sorry to hear that
johnnyaimster (2:29:59 PM): that's why i couldn't even float you a loan when i knew you needed it
Me (2:30:30 PM): Well I don't really want to go after your personal assets
johnnyaimster (2:30:34 PM): i don't know the demographic...some of the promotions for products have gone pretty well
johnnyaimster (2:30:49 PM): well assets are only debts
Me (2:31:04 PM): Have you thought about selling the service to another one, like kazaa or whatever?
Me (2:31:10 PM): I know that feeling 😥
Me (2:31:20 PM): I haven't paid my student loans since july
johnnyaimster (2:31:34 PM): oh god
johnnyaimster (2:32:02 PM): how's your girlfriend taking it all
Me (2:32:07 PM): horribly
johnnyaimster (2:32:07 PM): if i can ask
Me (2:32:17 PM): she was suicidal for a while
Me (2:32:22 PM): extremely depressed
Me (2:32:25 PM): she is better now
Me (2:32:31 PM): but still depressed
johnnyaimster (2:32:41 PM): wow you have been through hell and back my friend
Me (2:32:51 PM): we were just about to get back on our feet when everything happened
Me (2:33:00 PM): well I don't think I am back yet
johnnyaimster (2:33:17 PM): true you have definitely had it the hardest of anyone here
johnnyaimster (2:33:37 PM): unfortunately while i keep in touch with everyone to see how they're doing
johnnyaimster (2:33:44 PM): i really have lost touch with you
johnnyaimster (2:33:59 PM): i never see you online for example
johnnyaimster (2:34:16 PM): you're on my buddylist as Me are you still that name?
Me (2:34:25 PM): Yes, sometimes
johnnyaimster (2:34:45 PM): well sorry i lost touch with's not because i didn't care
Me (2:35:03 PM): Well I have been avoiding you
Me (2:35:19 PM): to be completely honest
Me (2:35:34 PM): I was terrified and very angry
johnnyaimster (2:35:43 PM): yes and i assumed there wasn't a problem...
johnnyaimster (2:36:00 PM): that you had the place in queens and would be ok for a little while
Me (2:36:06 PM): yes, I guess I should have been more forthright when I left
Me (2:36:25 PM): well moving alone cost $500 that I didn't have
johnnyaimster (2:36:34 PM): damn i didn't think of that
Me (2:36:35 PM): we had to have lisa's mom wire us the money from florida
Me (2:36:59 PM): at least they let us out of the lease there
johnnyaimster (2:37:15 PM): oh that was one good break
Me (2:37:18 PM): yes
johnnyaimster (2:37:35 PM): i've had to borrow money from friends and family to make it through too
Me (2:37:39 PM): the management are nice people, just incompetent I guess
Me (2:37:46 PM): I also had to borrow $1100 from coworker
Me (2:38:02 PM): somehow I'll pay it back
johnnyaimster (2:38:04 PM): oh wow
johnnyaimster (2:38:11 PM): a friend in need is a friend indeed
Me (2:38:29 PM): lisa recently got some student loan money and we're paying the rent in queens with that right now
johnnyaimster (2:38:55 PM): plus it's such a tough time right now with the wtc tragedy
Me (2:39:04 PM): but I have the niagara mohawk and verizon and RR bills following me all over
Me (2:39:09 PM): yes, that was awful
johnnyaimster (2:39:44 PM): well we'll all get through it somehow
Me (2:39:53 PM): yes if we don't catch anthrax
Me (2:40:02 PM): that's just what I need
johnnyaimster (2:40:13 PM): we raised about almost 1000 for redcross through aimster
Me (2:40:15 PM): I'm in Manhattan right now
johnnyaimster (2:40:22 PM): oh cool
Me (2:40:23 PM): that's good
Me (2:40:39 PM): I just started working at a place last week
johnnyaimster (2:40:50 PM): there was an anthrax case in nyc today someone said?
johnnyaimster (2:41:00 PM): congratulations!
Me (2:41:13 PM): well they are just reporting it today but it happened sept 25th they said
Me (2:41:14 PM): thanks
johnnyaimster (2:41:26 PM): computer stuff?
Me (2:41:45 PM): Yes, PHP, HTML, Oracle, and all sorts of admin stuff
johnnyaimster (2:41:52 PM): neato
Me (2:41:59 PM): I was lucky to find it
johnnyaimster (2:42:09 PM): well and they were lucky to find you
Me (2:42:24 PM): well, we'll see how it goes
Me (2:42:36 PM): the pay is a lot less but hopefully there is room for advancement
johnnyaimster (2:43:18 PM): the pay scale here was not too shabby
Me (2:43:20 PM): But really, have you thought of selling Aimster to one of the other file sharing companies?
johnnyaimster (2:43:28 PM): and the work environment was great
Me (2:43:29 PM): no, the pay at aimster was excellent
johnnyaimster (2:43:38 PM): lots of freedom
Me (2:43:45 PM): yes, once we got the desks it was a nice place
johnnyaimster (2:43:54 PM): haha
Me (2:44:01 PM): those foldup tables sucked
johnnyaimster (2:44:13 PM): and it was creative and everyone was doing something
Me (2:44:15 PM): yes
johnnyaimster (2:44:19 PM): that could potentially make a difference
Me (2:44:29 PM): if all the stuff hadn't happened I would have loved to stay there
johnnyaimster (2:44:33 PM): look back on it and say that was an accomplishment
Me (2:44:41 PM): Yes, I am proud of Mac Aimster
Me (2:44:50 PM): too bad the last version we released was really buggy
johnnyaimster (2:44:54 PM): it's awesome
Me (2:44:56 PM): but oh well
johnnyaimster (2:45:26 PM): we're not dead though...we'll be back in it
johnnyaimster (2:45:39 PM): the other file-sharing services just got sued you know
johnnyaimster (2:45:42 PM): kazaa etc.
Me (2:45:42 PM): yeah
Me (2:46:05 PM): I read a thing that said aimster is #4
johnnyaimster (2:46:07 PM): they're going to shut down in a hurry i would guess
Me (2:46:23 PM): well not if RIAA does what they did with Aimster
Me (2:46:30 PM): put it off for years
johnnyaimster (2:46:37 PM): riaa already sued them in LA
Me (2:46:55 PM): well they already sued us too, didn't they?
johnnyaimster (2:46:57 PM): so the they'll move at lightning speed to get an injunction
johnnyaimster (2:47:03 PM): no w sued them in albany
Me (2:47:07 PM): oh right
johnnyaimster (2:47:15 PM): so our case is fact we just had great news on that
Me (2:47:23 PM): I wonder why those other people didn't do the same
Me (2:47:29 PM): oh really
johnnyaimster (2:47:32 PM): yesterday the 2nd circuit court of appeals upheld judge kahn's decision
johnnyaimster (2:47:38 PM): and said the case should be in albany
Me (2:47:40 PM): ahh, thats good
johnnyaimster (2:47:47 PM): yes that's huge for us
Me (2:47:57 PM): well, let them keep fighting over where to hold it
johnnyaimster (2:48:12 PM): it was even a summary no written decision
johnnyaimster (2:48:18 PM): total slam dunk
Me (2:48:26 PM): what happened to your deal with citibank and boies schiller?
johnnyaimster (2:48:40 PM): well i dont' want to sound like a whiner
johnnyaimster (2:48:50 PM): but the wtc tragedy totally postponed it
johnnyaimster (2:49:04 PM): citigroup was turned into an emergency rescue center for a month
Me (2:49:10 PM): oh wow
johnnyaimster (2:49:17 PM): and they're just getting back now
johnnyaimster (2:49:37 PM): same with the law firm which was in manhattan...postponed everything
johnnyaimster (2:49:58 PM): the consequences of that disaster were really widespread
Me (2:50:01 PM): well that sucks for you
Me (2:50:07 PM): yeah the whole economy tanked
johnnyaimster (2:50:07 PM): yes for us
Me (2:50:22 PM): well it sucks for everybody I mean
johnnyaimster (2:50:25 PM): and so the capital call was postponed when the stock market tanked
johnnyaimster (2:50:46 PM): but we were fortunate compared to the real victims of the wtc
Me (2:50:46 PM): yeah I guess they don't want to go investing millions right now
Me (2:50:49 PM): yes
Me (2:51:07 PM): I go through penn station every day on my way to work
johnnyaimster (2:51:08 PM): although you were pretty hard hit too
johnnyaimster (2:51:18 PM): oh really?
Me (2:51:23 PM): well my problems had nothing to do with wtc
Me (2:51:40 PM): yeah, there is a huge wall with the victims' pictures
Me (2:51:51 PM): and national guard and police everywhere
johnnyaimster (2:52:04 PM): yes everything is different now isn't it
Me (2:52:12 PM): Yes
Me (2:52:26 PM): I think America will emerge stronger
Me (2:52:35 PM): it sounds like a cliche but I think it will be true
johnnyaimster (2:52:50 PM): yes although i'm a little worried about big brother becoming stronger
Me (2:52:53 PM): at least we have a purpose this time unlike vietnam
johnnyaimster (2:52:58 PM): all these searches now are becoming routine
Me (2:52:59 PM): yes, that is stupid
Me (2:53:11 PM): outlawing encryption
Me (2:53:18 PM): I'm sure the terrorists will obey the law
Me (2:53:23 PM): stupid politicians
Me (2:53:41 PM): anyway, I have to get back to work
johnnyaimster (2:53:51 PM): oh ok great to talk to you
Me (2:54:04 PM): let me know if aimster gets back on its feet
johnnyaimster (2:54:19 PM): i'll keep you up to date on everything from now on
Me (2:54:22 PM): Ok
Me (2:54:26 PM): Just cc: me in emails
johnnyaimster (2:54:28 PM): sorry for losing touch
johnnyaimster (2:54:30 PM): ok
Me (2:54:42 PM): ok, bye bye
johnnyaimster (2:54:48 PM): bye

Bye Bye Albany

Well, I’m out of Albany completely now. All that’s left to do there is break my lease, cancel gas, electric, phone, cable. I got fucked by the jackass at U-Haul who said I could return the truck to any U-Haul in Queens any time until they close. It turned out that I had to have the truck back by 1 PM so I got charged $40 for an extra day for returning the truck at 6:30. Soo $175 for the truck, plus $39.11 in gas (assholes gave it with 3/8 tank) plus $22.40 in tolls plus $40 late fee == I FUCKING HATE AIMSTER. The article on Slashdot and CNET and ZDNN about people stealing from the former employers who gave them the shaft really hit home. I would love to steal from Aimster. Anything I can to get some form of money back from them.

My problems != significant

Whenever there is a tragedy it causes us to put things in perspective. I was awakened at 9:30 on Tuesday, 9/11/01 by my girlfriend telling me that two planes had been flown into the World Trade Center.

We live in Queens so were not really in any grave danger, but we were pretty shaken by these events. My girlfriend had class that day at Columbia, on Manhattan’s upper West side. Class was cancelled, of course, as it was for the next day and probably the next few days. It’s rare to receive notice that class has been cancelled because of terrorism.

The events of yesterday have been thoroughly explained in the various media so there’s no reason for me to rehash them once again. But it felt completely unreal. It was not happening. The video of the second plane hurtling into the second tower looked like special effects. These sorts of things just don’t happen! I mean, there is an aircraft carrier group (USS George Washington) stationed off the coast of New York!

My girlfriend had so much trouble believing it was real that we drove around last night looking for a spot where we could see the Manhattan skyline. We found ourselves on Northern Boulevard and somehow wound up by the Queens entrance to the Midtown tunnel. Behind us, we could see the Manhattan skyline and the plumes of smoke and dust. I actually couldn’t turn around and look as I had to go to the bathroom really bad, but my girlfriend was just awestruck.

The Long Island Expressway, the artery that runs most of the length of the island, was deserted. I’ve travelled the LIE at all hours of the day and even at 4 AM I’ve never seen it that empty. I made it from the tunnel to Bellerose (on the Nassau/Queens border) in less than 10 minutes. Which is fortunate since I really had to go to the bathroom.

My heart goes out to all who’ve lost loved ones and to the FDNY and NYPD and all the volunteers helping out. I’m going to try and give blood again soon; yesterday I couldn’t even get in the parking lot. I donated $5 to the PayPal relief fund. I know it’s a pittance but I’m flat broke. If I believed in god, I would pray for them all.

Tonight I go back to Albany where I will pack more. My problems seem so trivial now.

I hope the revenge of the United States is swift and decisive. We must let these cowards know that we will no longer stand for this!